You deserve my all Lord (Jai)

V1:
You will never have me incomplete
Without a heart that speaks of You with every beat
Daily take me far from compromise
Open up my eyes, to see with Heaven’s sight
I’m praying

Chorus:
Open my eyes and I will walk Your way every single day
You deserve my all Lord (You deserve it)
Open my mouth and I will shout Your praise Louder every day
You deserve my all Lord (You deserve it)

V2:
Put a new song inside of me I pray
An anthem for today to show the world Your way
Singing of the greatness of Your love
The Blessing of Your Son, the power of His love
You saved me!

Bridge:
I wanna know Your heart! Show me who You are!
Speak and I will go! Lead and I’ll follow!

(source http://justjai.com/lyrics/)

Had to share this song with you guys, I just love it!

A Life

Last night I was at a friends and we watched "Not without my daughter"
and the story goes that an American woman, Her Iranian Husband and their daughter go on vacation in Tehran for "two weeks". Due to family pressure and his Islamic faith her husband forces her to stay in Tehran, where she is required to wear a burqua etc. Long story short she tries to escape and he becomes very violent with her, many opportunities arise in which she could leave *by herself* but she refuses to leave without her daughter. In the end she finally gets back, but the thing that really hits home is that the story was true, and is true for many Western wives living in the Middle East.

This post isn't saying that all Muslims are women beaters, I'm very sure there is lost of nice muslims out there who love their familes. But the thing is there are lots of people being abused out there right now, regardless of religion, "race" or gender. Some people never get out of it and believe that this is what life is like. And when you think about that hard or what an intense movie like that,
You can't help but think... So much doesn't matter

So much... your own comfort... your house. If someone out there is hurting... if someone out there is dying inside, how can we keep living? How can we look at the world in the same way? How can we complain about our own problems when there is millions out there who have absouletely no hope? When everyday... every breath is full of pain? How can we begin to think of staying at home and getting married and having children, when so many children are abandoned, abused, starved and killed. How can we read books on how to be feminine when so many women are having the life crushed out of them? How can we buy a new couch or up grade some part in our house, when others go hungry?
How can we hog a hope to ourselves because we are scared of what others may think. How can we walk past people who are in chains?

But then we get locked up in our own little world, the world in which our utmost pleasure comes first. We forget what another's reality is like, we all are guilty of walking by and yes that "we" includes me.
So then I guess the question is how we break out of that? By taking a running leap at Jesus and making the jump?

Spaetzle

Spaetzle is a German free form pasta that I made this morning. Really addictive, I keep going back to the pan for more ;)
So here's the recipe

1 cup of Milk (about)
2 eggs (or one)
1 1/2 tsp of salt
2 1/4 flour

Mix milk, egg, salt and any other flavouring ( herbs, spices etc.)
Stir in flour. Add more flour or milk 'til it becomes the consistency of
thick pancake batter (sloppy batter) Rest 10mins

Bring a pot of water to the boil. Turn it down a little til it gently boils.
Push the batter through a colander (with a spatula) and into the water.
When the pasta floats to the top scoop it out and into a buttered pan.
Cook them a little in the pan. Serve with meat, gravy, soup or whatever.


 Pintrest

Vote

Do you think it is very good if people write about their feelings on a blog -as in what difficulties they are having? etc

our world

In these past to days I've been thinking about, well the situation in the world. Some of you probably know this but we are so terribly behind the times with any sort of news.
So for starters I didn't know that  the british crown wanted to reduce the world population to 1 billion to bring back under British rule. And the Prince and Queen have made this statement several times. How would they do this through the banks (in a hazelnut-shell) causing mass starvation.
I have heard a lot about banks myself but I was surprised that the rumor of mass murder could be achievable.

So I was thinking -what on earth do we do about that? Do we stock up on food and live in fear? Well the food bit might help, but then this is all self preservation. In that case do we employ all our money and hire an airplane and go round the restaurants and collect the 'pig food' and fly it off to those who are already starving in africa? But this even though it would make a world of a difference for them, we in theory would be treating them like monkeys, they are human they deserve the same as us. But then you go back to the idea of communism -which obviously doesn't work with selfish mankind.
So what do you do?
love- pour yourself out daily thinking -even in your own state of starvation, thinking only of what this would mean for the other person. Giving out in the face of mass murder for no gain -for almost no reason except that these people are beloved -God's passionate about them. That they deserve -or not deserve to see an inch of love and through this show Daddy/God can do so much more.  And in thinking this I was overwhelmed with the strength and sheer determination and trust in God this would take. I also know that this mayn't play out in my life time, but in the likelihood  of something happening      I can only hope that I can out just a tiny bit of this ideal. I guess we can practice. As I type people are starting out work - the most demoralizing kind there is, prostitution. In which they expose themselves to goodness knows who, for some money that requires being dominated by the unpredictable stronger sex.     And this is happening (at the most) an hour away from where I live.  


pictures meant to be coming

A Surprise!

Over the past few weeks we've had some vicious dog attacks. It started last year when our two bantums -and only layers were snapped in one night. A few weeks ago two other chickens were nabbed follow by four rabbits (all in an off the ground cage) next went our older rooster and two hens. Two days ago 4 young chickens were ripped out of a pretty secure cage -the dog(s) ripped out the chicken wire that their mother was also taken. And this morning we only find one hen and a rooster...

But also this morning our neighbour came over (they own the dogs)
and gave us two boxes of beef... steak, sausages, roasts and mince.
It was sooo exciting putting it in the freezer and realizing that the pork Mum had just ordered wouldn't fit. And all though it doesn't                          Source
quite replace the attachment one had to the chickens, it's pretty equal. I can only think that God can make good out of a bad situation!                                                                                                                                

Me Today

Today: April 10th, 2013

Outside my window: Chick/Chickens digging in the garden, tuna pink and aqua blue sky- Its dusk and getting cold

I am thinking: about what to write for JOJ -truly

I am thankful for: the wedding that's coming up, that my friend has been to a wonderful wedding in America

From the kitchen: ah.. not much, I made tea several days ago- forgot what though. 

I am wearing: my normal black pants, with a sea green top

I am creating:bunting for the wedding

I am going: ah.. count cars from 8am-5pm tomorrow

I am reading: The Moral Revoultion, very interesting. And the Bible :)

I am hoping: That Esther will get back safely. That Petra's jelly will work out -coca cola

I am hearing: The kettle boiling, and Mum tipping water on the garden

I am pondering: Trusting and obeying... all we have to do... so easy, so hard

My goals: To act in a passionate love to others, not out of duty. And to do all this when my heart is breaking...Daddy!

Jesus

“Jesus gave up his reputation 

so you wouldn’t be defined by yours.” 

~Jason Sterling

Source Christ is Write

Fixed!

umm you can actually ignore the last post. It's all fixed so I'll still be posting here :)
-Tiffany

God is everywhere

Last night I went to a combined youth group with all the New Life youth groups in our area. It was the strangest thing ever! There was a small group of us that went there with Cyrus and Naomi. At first it was really over-whelming like there were tons of young people some of them were giving each other piggy-back rides others, sucking lollipops it was pretty crazy. We just kinda stayed in the corner going yeah... ok.... um.... I was pretty uncomfortable a few people who knew C and N came up -the more sensible people. Our little group of "sane"home-schoolers just stood and stared.

After a little bit we all went into the hall room and took our seats which had a pen and paper on each one. Then one of the Youth pastors said we were gonna have some games... (I'd met the youth pastors before and they were just amazing, on fire for God Christians) We were told that out of the paper we had to make the fastest paper dart and put our name on it and throw it to the front... It was awesome! Darts were flying absolutely everywhere! Then they asked for three girl volunteers and three guys. They "partnered up" and then each "couple" had to decided who would eat. The eaters were sat down. A competetion was set and their "feeders" started to bring live after live hu-hu grub. The eaters swallow them down with effort. After that another set of three couples were chosen and the guys made to sit down while the girls pinned as many pegs as they could on to their partner's faces (end result was 15, 16, 15 pegs)

Then they had worship. How on earth do you do that when over half of the teens weren't Christian? It was madness. Some of the people were up the front praising God the others outside, texting or just galloping over the chairs. I was like... "God, how does this work?". But somehow it did somehow God was there and he was telling me that "I (God this is) can work anywhere. I'm not confined to their culture. I love each one of these people don't judge them- I have bought them in." I remembered this testimony that a guy had: In his dream there was a church and it was full of drunks, drug addicts and prostitutes - how were making out in the pews. The man then starting shouting at them telling them to get out. How dare they defile the house of God. Then God spoke to him and said "Don't send out what I have sent in." That hit him like a ton of bricks. And it hit me too, in that situation - Jesus always seemed to be in the company of prostitutes and tax collectors... he always went to the sick and healed them - as he said he came to heal those who needed healing teach those who were unlearned.

And I was just like....WOW! After that though I got distracted I tried to put my eyes on Him and not on the people who were ignoring Him. Honestly that night was Amazing! The message was about our relationship with God - that we shouldn't settle for less that we should see how much we can know Him in this short time on earth. Then they had even more worship everything seemed to be going up, up, up. And I know it wasn't emotional hype because I was very aware of not.. well I was just praising Jesus who had sent these teens here for some reason and he knew what He was doing even if half of them were already outside. And I honestly wasn't this amazing goody-goody who was only praising God - I got frustrated at Him for some of the things that have been happening to me that I just don't understand. At one time God just shook me (not literally but like a friend does when they're trying the get something across) and said "You're worth something to me! stop thinking you aren't!"I got prayed for by several people and one person was like I think God really wants you to know that you are really beautiful and I also think He wants to just hang out with you, rather than me praying for you to have a deeper revelation of Him. That night was really speacial and really strange - I want to go again even if I get slightly deaf in one ear again ;)
<3 Tiffany             

Frustrations

Just recently I've been thinking. Thinking about a lot of things
like why are we still here? If God has so much in supply what on earth are we doing here? Staying where it is nice and comfortable - when human trafficking has reached 27 million.
Why aren't we taking to heart what Jesus said? He told his disciples to go -with only the clothing on their backs. Why don't we give scandalously?

There are other things like -why do we go to church every Sunday, to get encouraged when we are given encouragement to encourage others - there never seems enough time between Monday and Saturday. Why aren't we doing anything? Why does everything have to be so P.C?
Jesus said to go free the lost- since when did material things come into that?

But I know that we aren't perfect. But every person could do so much. and yes we're all on different levels of selfishness. But God? Doesn't that mean something? If he supplies all- why is there such a thing as normal? Why on earth do we wait? Why don't we love passionately?
Why don't we teach children to give? 
- I guess Jesus just came to seek and save the lost, not to make the earth perfect. Why do people let themselves be bogged down- why does fear exist? Why don't people reach out and say that there is a meaning to life? Why aren't we listening to God? Why does God let us do this? I guess we will know when we get to heaven? Why on earth do we have to wait that 
long? Why do we try and scramble for God just to make us feel better?

I guess I just typed the Christian ideal, but this is what I was thinking about on Sunday. But there was several things I realized after hounding about our imperfections one of them was that we need to strengthen people regardless of what they do to us. 
That of course is really hard and I might get there one day - but it is what Jesus does.
But one thing is for sure I would far rather walk on water with my Jesus than grow old in a rocking chair wishing I had. And there will be times when I'll be a Bilbo Baggins and wish for my nice cosy home. But for the moment as this song says I don't want to go through the motions.  
  
The Motions
This might hurt, it's not safe
But I know that I've gotta make a change
I don't care if I break
At least I'll be feeling something

‘Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of life

I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me

I don't wanna spend my whole life asking
What if I had given everything 
Instead of going through the motions?

No regrets, not this time
I'm gonna let my heart defeat my mind 
Let Your love make me whole
I think I'm finally feeling something

‘Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of this life

‘Cause I don't wanna go through the motions 
I don't wanna go one more day
Without your all consuming passion inside of me

I don't wanna spend my whole life asking 
What if I had given everything 
Instead of going through the motions?

Take me all the way
(Take me all the way)
Take me all the way
(‘Cause I don't wanna go through the motions)
Take me all the way
(Lord, I'm finally feeling something real)
Take me all the way

I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me

I don't wanna spend my whole life asking 
What if I had given everything 
Instead of going through the motions?

I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me

I don't wanna spend my whole life asking 
What if I had given everything 
Instead of going through the motions?
Take me all the way
(Take me all the way)
Take me all the way
(I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go)

Take me all the way
(Through the motions)
Take me all the way

I don't wanna go through the motions
-Matthew West

Style or shortness?

Ok that sounded bad....
but it is a little continuation on this modesty stuff I've been spouting ;)
-It's completely open to discussion.

Length of clothing  -great

Anyway there was this picture I found, it was talking about pants/skirts. It was a picture of a leg with several marks upon it.
bottom mark on the leg said (lower calf) matronly 
the next at mid calf, prudish
the one above old-fashioned
then proper at knee length
Flirty is at lower thigh
cheeky at mid thigh 
followed by provocative,
asking for it, slut  and at the very top: whore.

I found that very interesting, and slightly amusing. I for one tend to stick at proper for several reasons.  
One, it's not so bad on windy day -this is skirts :) 
But two is because actually (according to several modern fashion books) skirts that rest at mid thigh, in the curve just below your knee and in the curve between your knee and your thigh are actually the most  flattering.
And anyway I don't get all this nonsense about only 4 fingers above the knee (how does that work anyway? You have to bend over to measure which is silly, 'cause when you straighten it becomes several inches higher)  
But then all of this doesn't really matter to me -cause I'm in love with circular floor scrapers :)
And it doesn't to matter to you (if you are dressing yourself not your body)
it's just interesting...



   

A top up from my modesty sermon

lol

one thing I didn't state is don't let how you dress hurt people or break previous relationships.
As a friend said people are attracted to beautiful things (beauty is in the eye of the beholder- which really helps :/ )
But one thing is you mustn't freeze in time ( with your clothing) you must be open to trying new things
(which will mean you need to remember about modesty sometimes) and you also don't want to slap this culture in the face with some roman freak in a toga -or stola if you speak latin. We don't want our clothing as a brick wall between reaching out to people... so this requires a little in keeping with the fashions (not obessively)  Ah clothing is an art... To learn and put in the back of ones mind and momentarily forget about what you and everyone else is wearing (aka judging helps no one)


-Source mostly Lennie reminding me of what I forgot

Confused

At first it was small such a tiny step to make... who ever though it would have lead here...
to the place where you can't stop walking.

Was it ever meant to happen. No. Ah it seemed so innocent at first. But now it can't be gotten out of... no matter how hard you try.

They say it happened because you were looking for something, for love, perhaps? Well at least to feel wanted. But you can't ever consciously thinking, I need love. In fact you can't ever remember a beginning, it was just there... right from the start?

Anyway now its just there... and you can't get out of it... it comes whether you feel like it or not... it takes control.

You've tried to suspend it... and it works temporaily... but there's always that little thought that seems to be it's introduction.

They say you should just stop... but do they know how powerless you feel? but then are you really powerless? Is this just your thoughts swirling round... making you think that you feel powerless... Never matter those thoughts don't stop it coming again... and again... and again.

You feel terribly bad after... so ashamed that you couldn't stop yourself -not that you really wanted to when it came on. You said sorry to God more times than you have eyelashes to count... You have wondered if this thing was really all that bad... whether God got offended... whether He even cared... He didn't seem to be much help anyway... you always seemed to be treading the hamster wheel -again tis time with 10 more kilos on your back... well if there is any more weight you aren't to sure-after all you seem relitivly normal when its not there.

They say God sees you clean that He doesn't remember you that way.... they say He gets sad... and you don't want to make Him sad but then there are sometimes times when holding onto a bed post for hours is the only thing that helps... God said He came to set the captives free. But there you are -again. You know that everything happens in His perfect timing - But then if He was sad about it why doesn't He just fix it? Or do you have to do this all by yourself...? What does He call help?

They say there are green pastures (in God) in which you can lie in- but when you look for them and believe in them they never seem to come... they say you shouldn't trust your feelings... but how do you know that you are rested if that place of rest never seems to come... or is it one of those things that happen with out your knowing... but what's the point in that if you don't feel an ounce stronger?

Nothing is plain white, nothing is plain black... It's all grey... is it bad... other people would say so... but then aren't we mean to live by the Spirit and not by others convictions?.... are you lying to yourself...?

Is there hope for the addict?... or do you have to keep trudging this muddy path forever... the Bible says not...He says not... but when does this forever end... will reading help?.... does every body deal with this or is it only just you?... He said He'd only give you as much as you could handle.... and most times you do... but there are times when you don't .... will there ever be an end...

And how did God fall in love with you in this state?
How ever did He find in His heart to die?
This makes no sense I am so terribly, terribly confused...
and they say confusion is the mark of the enemy...
maybe I'm half possessed...............................?

Is there more colours than white - and black

Walking on water ain't that easy.
Specially if there's land on both sides.

Is there really more colours than black and white?

Music:

Many people believe that Christian modern music is harmful round here.
I don't.
I can't help but say that because of the amount of times that God has spoken
to me through such songs -even Christian heavy metal- yeah and for some of you that's ironic.
But with a lot of arguments backing both sides I have come to the realization that I may be wrong
-but you may be too.

As I am getting older I am realizing that a lot of things aren't just this - or that.
Not just black- or just white. There is a colour grey.
That only we humans see.-I could be wrong.

Things aren't that easy to work out. You can't just push somebody out of wearing a head scarf
-God may have told them to. Things that mayn't be sinful to you may be to some one else. (as it says in the New Testament)  How this comes to be -we don't know. But we don't need to...
Here is a challenge I lay before you- and me:
We are united in our belief of Jesus Christ- not in our beliefs.

If it weren't for the Holy Spirit we'd be in a muddle.
The important thing is to listen to the Holy Spirit before anyone else.
Oh this is hard to write my thoughts keep bouncing round -I'm guessing I'm not making much sense
but I'll post this anyway....