Whistful dreaming

Imagine setting off for distant lands. To where the wind howls sharply, and snow ices the ground for months. Where no food tastes the same. Where languages are different.
Where you can walk right over the border and be in a different world.

Imagine that...

I mean New Zealand is alright in itself, it's all I've ever known. But what's over that mountain? What's across that sea? Ah, wanderlust...just wait and see

Sewing patternless

Yup I'm doing it! I'm trying my hand at designing a jacket for the winter. A little scary, but awesome  -I can make whatever I like, with in the constraints of the material of course.
The jacket isn't completely patternless, I did start off with a 'base', remember this?

Well I'm basing it off this, because I want it to have some flair, not like an ordinary jacket. Plus it's the only jacket pattern we have (last I checked) So after lots of researching to decide just exactly what style I wanted, and lots of astronaut looking sketches

 I decided just to start, so I cut out the pattern in a large size (to leave room for draping etc) joined some of the pattern pieces together, as I didn't want the white biby thing that is in the above picture. I sewed a mock up in calico and spent ages in the mirror trying to pin it to fit. Then I decided to cut it in half so that I could add more length, cause as you can just see it didn't come down over my hips. So last night I added a strip and sewed it in between, like this (excuse the phone pictures)

(The right side is the top half by the way)

from the outside it looks more like this:

As you can see it's only half of it, and the bottom picture has the top on the left side instead.

Now I am starting to unpick the vertical seam so that I can cut it out on in the material (hence the lifeless half pictures) 

The material

And that's as far as I've gotten, I'm hoping to have finished unpicking today and get onto the real thing, and eventually the decorating (really looking forward to that part :D )

But I still have to design the hood, collar, and sleeves yet so hopefully it all goes smoothly :)
It'll probably be dystopian/post apocalyptic in style, using lots of zippers and old buttons for character :) This blog is definitely turning into a sewing/writing one.

-Tiffany 

The Courageous Girl

a short while ago I was talking with a friend of mine, in fact we had all been in the car and were talking about strengths when suddenly she said "Last year was really hard, I tried doing all this stuff and I didn't seem to be 'good' at anything, all my friends did really well at one thing or another and I was just average, so I decided that I'm good at being average, and that's all I might ever be good at, that I shouldn't expect to much of myself..."
Wow. How often do you hear that? How often do you know that someone isn't killing themselves to be something? True it's sad that she has such a low opinion of herself that she can't see that she is good at a lot of things.  But imagine what the world would be like if people excepted their capabilities, that could be humble about what they can and can't do. Anyway there's just a little glimpse of a real princess, who I wish I was a lot more like

Frustrations

Just recently I've been thinking. Thinking about a lot of things
like why are we still here? If God has so much in supply what on earth are we doing here? Staying where it is nice and comfortable - when human trafficking has reached 27 million.
Why aren't we taking to heart what Jesus said? He told his disciples to go -with only the clothing on their backs. Why don't we give scandalously?

There are other things like -why do we go to church every Sunday, to get encouraged when we are given encouragement to encourage others - there never seems enough time between Monday and Saturday. Why aren't we doing anything? Why does everything have to be so P.C?
Jesus said to go free the lost- since when did material things come into that?

But I know that we aren't perfect. But every person could do so much. and yes we're all on different levels of selfishness. But God? Doesn't that mean something? If he supplies all- why is there such a thing as normal? Why on earth do we wait? Why don't we love passionately?
Why don't we teach children to give? 
- I guess Jesus just came to seek and save the lost, not to make the earth perfect. Why do people let themselves be bogged down- why does fear exist? Why don't people reach out and say that there is a meaning to life? Why aren't we listening to God? Why does God let us do this? I guess we will know when we get to heaven? Why on earth do we have to wait that 
long? Why do we try and scramble for God just to make us feel better?

I guess I just typed the Christian ideal, but this is what I was thinking about on Sunday. But there was several things I realized after hounding about our imperfections one of them was that we need to strengthen people regardless of what they do to us. 
That of course is really hard and I might get there one day - but it is what Jesus does.
But one thing is for sure I would far rather walk on water with my Jesus than grow old in a rocking chair wishing I had. And there will be times when I'll be a Bilbo Baggins and wish for my nice cosy home. But for the moment as this song says I don't want to go through the motions.  
  
The Motions
This might hurt, it's not safe
But I know that I've gotta make a change
I don't care if I break
At least I'll be feeling something

‘Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of life

I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me

I don't wanna spend my whole life asking
What if I had given everything 
Instead of going through the motions?

No regrets, not this time
I'm gonna let my heart defeat my mind 
Let Your love make me whole
I think I'm finally feeling something

‘Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of this life

‘Cause I don't wanna go through the motions 
I don't wanna go one more day
Without your all consuming passion inside of me

I don't wanna spend my whole life asking 
What if I had given everything 
Instead of going through the motions?

Take me all the way
(Take me all the way)
Take me all the way
(‘Cause I don't wanna go through the motions)
Take me all the way
(Lord, I'm finally feeling something real)
Take me all the way

I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me

I don't wanna spend my whole life asking 
What if I had given everything 
Instead of going through the motions?

I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me

I don't wanna spend my whole life asking 
What if I had given everything 
Instead of going through the motions?
Take me all the way
(Take me all the way)
Take me all the way
(I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go)

Take me all the way
(Through the motions)
Take me all the way

I don't wanna go through the motions
-Matthew West

The reason, I AM

This is the most true to me post ever well I hope so...


Lately I've been thinking; oh my goodness I'm about to turn fifteen, one 6th of my life is almost over -that is if I live till ninety, I'd rather not :)
But you see if you live to manage to live to 90 you have lived your life in thirds, 30, 60 & 90. And what I find scary is that I've already lived half of one of those, now you may be thinking 15 is that old but when you look it in that light you begin to panic....
                                                                                                 ..... Well that's only if you're me

I don't want to waste my life. full stop. Wasting a life is the worst thing I think you could ever do seeing as everyone has so much potential, so much ability. And the only way I can see of avoiding this is by following God, but the only problem with this is that He doesn't hurry. I am not a patient person, and sometimes this slowness annoys me because the other thing I'd most like to do is to do what He wants me to do while I'm still young and that means that I need to get a move on soon, so I can learn what skills I'll need for serving Him. And while he will take anyone with any ability it frustrates me that He does say "I want you to become a doctor". You have to find out the slow way.


I don't believe I have been called to write. (jaw dropping gab). I meant that. I have never dreamt of writing a book, even though I have thought it would be nice. Writing is actually a skill that has only just matured over the last two years, the years I have been a Christian, and while I've got the ability to do it, I don't want to. I think it is a talent that is only meant for now.
Many people, my Mother included think this is mad, that I am wasting a God given talent. But I believe God has called me to bigger things.

That is why you have heard crazy stuff about me wanting to be a midwife. And I can tell you it isn't what I've always wanted to be, I never knew what I wanted to be. But this has grown and though I don't know what it is like to "have a dream" I think this is pretty close to one. But I wouldn't want to be a midwife here, oh no -that is too boring...

Have you ever seen, lets say imagined a little boy walking along a dusty road. Wait a moment I need to paint...

Swirling winds twist and turn along narrow windy sand strewn road they beat against a boy, a boy is walking this street his cailco robe wraps tightly around his legs. His skin is dark, ebony black showered by specks of sand. He has dark eyes, deep and scarred and shot with sorrow, a sorrow so pained, a sorrow one so young should not know...

There is also a woman. But she is somewhere else. Yet sand still blows here, and the heat is suffacating yet many are dressed in black flowing robes that cover them from head to foot. It is a market and there is one particular woman and she is going home.
And it is in her home I first saw her. It was in a room but the surroundings didn't matter all that mattered was the pain there, I knew then that she had been beaten but more than that, I knew that this woman had never had a flicker of love touch her life and I knew she was dying, that she was being strangled, strangled by some unseen force, not pyscially strangled but mentally, emotionaly. And she was screaming for help, screaming like nothing you've ever heard before, but it was the scream of someone who has lost hope, of someone who knows help won't come. And oh how I wanted to be there, well not me as I didn't think I could help, but I wanted someone to. It was then I remembered that lots of people have this happen to them all the time. One just has to pray for them. And please they are screaming out.

I do believe I've been called to women. I believe I've been called to midwifery in the middle east to Muslims. I know what you are thinking.... the middle east..... wars.... certain death, but I'd rather be in the thick of it than lulling where all is peaceful where everything is "Ok"
I believe I've been called to midwifery because then you are reaching the women who are so often shut down in those countries, here you can reach the unreached, here is the worst danger, for here you are under their roof.


"Some wish to live within the sound of a chapel bell; I wish to run a rescue mission within a yard of hell."  ~ C. T. Studd


Miss Tiffany